Ye Olde Chat

A worthy contest, well fought.

A fine battle, indeed.

Victory came most effortlessly.

A valiant attempt, good sir.

Thy talents are most lacking.

Thy shortcomings are entirely thine own.

Pray, improve thy craft.

Thou art but a novice in these lands.

I bear this kingdom alone.

A triumph snatched from the jaws of defeat.

Thou art delivering victory unto our foes.

Bring this knave to the council.

Surely dark sorcery is at work here.

Guard our sacred stronghold.

Forward, brethren! Press the assault!

Retreat! Preserve thy lives!

Lay down thy arms, warriors.

Cease thy generous offerings to the enemy.

Pray, mend these grievous wounds.

My life hangs by the slenderest thread.

A mere breeze shall finish him.

The coward lurks within his wretched corner.

Thou fleest from thy defeat.

My connection hath betrayed me.

Alas, I have departed this mortal realm.

I shall presently return from the grave.

The fault, I confess, is mine.

Perhaps thou shouldst seek another vocation.

My most esteemed companion.

Indeed, I speak the truth.

I confess, I know not.

By the heavens above!

What manner of madness is this?

Thou hast amused me greatly.

I am overcome with mirth.

Good gracious, what remarkable proportions.

A man of remarkable independence.

A most impressive charm indeed.

Thy fate appears most unfortunate.

My esteemed companion is beyond salvation.

Alas, our fate hath already been sealed.

Stay thy hand. Let the man pursue his craft.

Something most foul is afoot.

Thou speakest falsehoods.

I swear these words bear no deception.

So be it.

Thy conviction commands my respect.

I recoil from this most dreadful display.

Remarkably ordinary, I must confess.

A glorious triumph!

A most lamentable defeat.

The court hath judged thee most unfavourably.

Thou hast spoken for far too long.

Venture forth and acquaint thyself with nature.

What a most glorious spectacle!

I am overcome with uncontrollable mirth.

Breathe deeply of thy comforting delusions.

I sustain myself upon the promise of unlikely fortune.

His fury hath consumed both mind and scalp.

A most dreadful unease hath befallen me.

Alas! My sorrow knows no bounds.

A melancholy fate, indeed.

Pray awaken me when something of consequence occurs.

Surely I speak with complete sincerity...

Blissfully unaware of the calamity that approaches.

Alas, the terrible truth hath been revealed.

Rejoice, good people! The assembly hath triumphed!

The assembly hath disgraced itself once more.

Good people, doth mine eyes deceive me?

GOOD PEOPLE, WHAT MADNESS IS THIS?!

Wardens, I summon thee!

WARDENS! SEIZE THIS KNAVE AT ONCE!

Banish this scoundrel from our realm.

Let this knave never again cross our gates.

Remove this fool until his senses return.

I remain amongst thee, though silent and unseen.

Cease thy counsel, for none hath requested it.

Preserve this moment for the chronicles!

Scribes! Record what hath just transpired!

Open the gates! A foreign host approaches!

This broadcast is held together by prayer alone.

Pay thy respects, good people.

Flood the halls with symbols of triumph!

By the heavens, the man hath prepared a feast.

Remove this man from the kitchens immediately.

Rejoice! Our glorious age hath returned!

Alas, all hope hath forsaken us.

Behold! A masterpiece worthy of the royal theatre.

Never hath mankind witnessed greater excellence.

This fellow appears bound to a most limited script.

Fortune shamelessly favours this wretch.

Thy competence leaves much to be desired.

Pray tell, who solicited this discourse?

Thy proclamation hath stirred not a single soul.

I beseech thee, grant us the gift of silence.

Weep, then, if it eases thy troubled heart.

I must respectfully decline.

I must briefly depart from this realm.

Await me, for I shall return shortly.

Alas, I must now take my leave.

Good heavens, the witching hour is upon us.

One final battle, and then we rest.

One final battle, I swear it upon my honour.